Opened doors
by APHBrussels
Summary: Feelings we are scared to share are locked behind closed doors. What happens if those doors were opened?


_After 10 years of bullying, if it wasn't even more then that. I lost count way to fast but then again at times like those you just hope that time moves fast and that you don't have to worry too much. You hope that you don't have to worry about surviving._

 _People say that school is a breeze and that kids should not have to complain. That the world after school is so harsh but they sometimes forget that not for everyone life during the years behind desk is easy._

 _I am not saying that the adult world isn't bad but I am just saying that the child world isn't like a world full of peace and butterflies._

 _The bully that has been bullying me for those years, just stopped but never told me the reason why. I wouldn't have minded not knowing why if it was just an ordinary bully but Bufford was a friend of mine, he still is after these years. It is a complicated one but to be completely honest I don't quite mind._

 _I am happy that the bullying is over though, since I do saw a lot of money that in the past was spend on buying new clothes and underwear. It is nice to not have to worry about those kind of things anymore. It is small but that is something that doesn't bother me._

 _The thing about this situation is. Bufford doesn't do things without an reason. He may not be the brightest out there but he for sure isn't dumb. Even if he tries to make people believe that he is not. He has a problem finding what is the most important over what is not._

 _He is a man with rules he really holds onto very hard, which was really surprising when I first heard him talk about it. Codes he has really sworn to in the years I have known him. I am glad that he does have these kind of things._

 _It shows that he is not as bad as a lot of people paint him as. He is not pure evil, everyone who has been bullied knows that Bufford is far from heartless. The people who paint him like this are people who have seen him act but never really interacted with him. Very likely out of fear that something would happen to them if they did get close to him._

 _For a big and rough build guy he tends to have a soft side as well. He can act nice if he really wants to. I was the first of our friend to get to see that side of him._

 _He has saved me from other bullies several times over the years now. Claiming that I was his nerd and would not tolerate someone else to bully me. The only reason he actually does say this is for me to not end up with bullies who really have the intend on hurting me._

 _Yes he has ripped some of my clothes in the past, I got wet willies and some punches against my shoulders. But besides some ripped clothes and some small bruises I have never been really hurt by him. Or you need to be really sensitive to by hurt by just be called nerd from time to time.  
Oh my apologies I forgot to introduce myself I am Baljeet Rai. I am 20 years old and I was born in India. But I actually don't remember much of my time spend there. My parents and I moved to the US when I was around the age of 3 or 4 so it is very normal I don't remember much._

 _People have one reason why they know me, which I feel mixed about. I'm the smartest kid of the class ever since my first year in elementary school. Not that I want to brag about my grades or anything. I would never want to do that._

 _It more of a family tradition that I am forced to keep high. The thing is that I am the first of my family to study on American soil and the education there and here do happened to be different. Not that I say they are bad. Far from that. It's just that I am not sure if it is healthy to compare how I do at school over here with how my parents did over there._

 _The world is ever changing and so is the education that we get at school. But I am complaining now more than anything else. Sometimes the pressure of having to succeed get the better of me. Sometimes I just can't handle it and he knows it._

 _My parents always brag that after just a few months in the Western world I could speak fluent English. They always want to show off how smart I am because they were unable to get any kids besides me. It is something my mom is very sad about._

 _My mother language was indeed Hindi but the reason why I was able to learn English that quickly was because I was so young. By the time I could speak some Hindi they were already teaching me English. Being the only child helped since they only had to focus on me when teaching it.  
The questions I keep asking myself now are: Could I take my life in my own hands? Not depending on the traditions of my family?_

 _I want to have my life in my own hands, like how I want it to be. Not do things just because my family wants me to. But I am just afraid they would kick me out of the house and pretend like I never existed…_

"Bajeet, hey dude are you okay? You look like something is very wrong?"

"Yes, I am fine. Just thinking about things I maybe should not be thinking too much about. You know me. My mind is always filled with thoughts that don't have to be there."


End file.
